Mind Healing Counselling

Most people want to be real as people. We want to feel like we belong where we are. We're happy with who we are. Taking both our skills and weaknesses into account. Able to live in a way that reflects our personality, beliefs, inner values, and interests.

Authenticity means being true to yourself and acting in a way that shows who you are at your core. It means that you always try to be yourself, even when you're alone, with other people, or in social settings. It also means that you act in a way that is consistent with your values, no matter what other people say, and that you're rooted in your own values no matter what happens.

Being true to yourself not only feels good, but much study shows that it's strongly linked to psychological well-being and living a full life. A meta-analysis of 75 studies, for example, found that truthfulness was linked to general well-being and being involved in work and life (Sutton, 2020). Even though being true to ourselves is good for us (and most of us want to feel comfortable in our own skin!), it can be scary to figure out who we are and act on that.

There are ways to become more real, which is good news. In a recent study, Kipfelsberger (2022) found that some parts of being genuine can be taught and practised. Here are four simple skills you can start doing right away to become more real:

1. Practice observing yourself.

To be real, you have to be willing to learn new things about yourself. Take the time each day to notice your thoughts, feelings, and actions. Try to learn how to watch yourself. What traits best describe you? What do you like and dislike? The way you act?

2. Explore and identify your values.

To be authentic, you have to know what your most important ideals are because these are the things that should guide your actions. So, explore and discover your core values. Do you value honesty? independence? family? loyalty? Write down what's most important to you right now.

3. Look for inconsistencies in your choices.

If you want to be real, your ideas, words, feelings, and actions should all be the same. So, how do your values show up in the choices you make? Are there ways that they don't show up? Do you sometimes do things that go against what you say you stand for? If what you say, what you think and how you feel and don't match up, stop and work out how to make your morals and decisions match up.

4. Build your self-esteem.

The more confident you are in who you are as a person, the easier it will be for you to be yourself no matter what. This also lets you accept your faults and mistakes without being paralysed by shame or guilt, and it lets you deal with people who don't like you, criticise you, or even reject you because you're not the same as them.

Learn to appreciate all the great things about yourself. When you feel you fall short of what you would like to be, remember that life is a journey, a learning process. The goal isn't to be perfect; it's to learn from your mistakes so you don't end up repeating them.

Becoming Who You Truly Are

The naked truth is that you are likely to face a lot of events in your life that will force you to look in the mirror. These things make you wonder, “Who am I?” “Why do I feel like this?” “Is this who I want to be?” “Is this how I want to live?”



Even though many of these situations are hard, they also give you a great gift: the chance to be more true to yourself. Or, as Carl Jung put it so well, the chance to become who you really are. Observe yourself, look for inconsistencies in your views and choices, and work on building your self-esteem to help you become more real. People will like you more if you're honest, and you'll feel more comfortable in your own skin if your actions match how you feel inside